Tuesday, March 29, 2011

What is your name again?

This is what my grandmother keeps asking me everytime I go to visit her.
Family issues with my grandmother are getting relatively serious.  She did go in for her memory test and now she will have to meet with a psychologist to evaluate her before they will diagnose her with Alzeihmers.  She has it, she has all but a few signs of it and it is only getting worse. 
What bothers me is that my mom and her sister are not on the same page.  My mom took my grandmother's car keys to keep her from driving.  My mom has been reading a book that was given to her by the Alzeihmer's Foundation which highlights some key points.  Like, if you would not want your children and grandchildren riding in the car of a loved one suspected of Alzheimers than take away the keys.  My aunt thinks that her mom is faking it.  That she is intentionally putting on an act to get attention.  It is really starting to wear thin with me. 
The last doctors appointment that my grandfather had, the doctor got in his face and told him that if he wants to live longer, than he needs to move out of the house.  My grandfather was taking up to 4 nitro pills for his heart a day. He moved in with my aunt and that lasted all of two weeks.  My grandmother was visiting my grandfather one day.  She got upset and said she was going for a walk.  Two hours later, my mom found her at her home.  My aunt lives 17 miles from my grandmother.  We have no clue how she got home. Futhermore, my aunt never looked for her after an hour had passed.  She just assumed she was pouting and she would return after she calmed down.  
The whole thing with my grandparents is that we know that my grandfather does not have much more time with us.  I will be surprised if he is still here this Christmas.  Once he is gone, my grandmother will have to put into an assisted living facility.  My mom doesn't think that there will be any money left to pay for the kind of care she needs.  I think my grandmother will qualify for a Medicare plan that will pay her arrangements.  I am trying to help my mom work out the details and research the next plan of action.
My grandfather just recently changed his will so that when he does pass, my mom will have power of attorney and control so that my grandmother can't spend all the money or sign away the title to the house.  This happens more than people think. 
Not to long ago, my grandmother opened up her own bank account and withdrew a thousand dollars but does not remember doing it and/or where she put or spent the money.  This is not typical of a person with a sound mind.  Yet my aunt thinks she may have hidden it in a shoebox or something and actually wanted my mom and I to go through her things when we cleaned her house last week. 
My grandmother's memory are from her childhood.  That is all she talks about but if you ask her what she did five minutes ago, she will just give you a blank stare and tell you she doesn't remember.  It is heartbreaking to see her decline like this. 

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