Chris and I had a long discussion about what to do for the fourth of July. We have decided to stay home. Not because we want to mind you, but because we simply can not afford to waste gas for entertainment purposes. So unfortunately for us we will just have to rely on our outdoor pillows and blankets to keep us comfortable while trying to see some of the neighbors fireworks displays from our deck. Something that we haven't done in ages. We have also declared a movie marathon night.
I feel less that a stellar mom to Katie right now because she knows that we were planning on hitting the beach scene for an entire day and night. It may not be something that many folks would want to do but Katie was looking forward to it, and for that I feel terrible. I do not even have enough money to buy for sparklers for her and I really hope that maybe she will forget about our tradition but I know deep inside my heart that she won't. She won't complain, she won't get upset, she won't even pout, because she knows that something is different. We have tried to explain to her that because daddy is not working that the money we used to have is not there. Her solution to "helping out the family" is to have a lemonade stand when we have our yard sale a week from tomorrow. She is so determined to do her part in helping the family through this very traumatic and sobering time. I just wish we weren't in this situation.